What do you call jokes are simply the best jokes because they draw your audience in with a leading question, so you can wack them over their unsuspecting heads with a spectacular wisecrack.

This brand of comedy is so approachable that you can use it in any occasion.

Living in a world without humor is like living in a world without ice cream. You might be able to survive, but we never want to find out what a sad world without ice cream looks like.

That's precisely why you need what do you call jokes.

Contents

3 Best What Do You Call Jokes

If you're ready for some gut-wrenching what do you call jokes, you might as well dive right into the best of them. We dug through our joke archives to fish out the best jokes we could find.

1. What do you call a horse that can’t lose a race?

A great joke for when you're in the betting mood.

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Answer

Sherbet

2. What do you call a group of unorganized cats?

Cat people go bananas for this gag.

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Catastrophe

3. What do you call a pig that knows karate?

A pig doing karate? You just can't go wrong with a good animal joke.

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Pork chop

 3 Corny What Do You Call Jokes

Sometimes, being just kind of silly isn't enough. That's when you need to whip out these super corny jokes from your reserves. Have you ever been watching your nieces or nephews for too many hours and found yourself in a cataclysmic downward spiral speeding head first into a class 5 meltdown?

Fear not, mon frere. That's where corny jokes, and maybe a sugary snack, come to the rescue.

4. What do you call an alligator in a vest?

A clever quip for any crowd.

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An investigator!

5. What do you call a droid that takes the long way around?

Save this wisecrack for the next time your partner takes a circuitous route.

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R2 detour.

6. What do you call a duck that gets all A’s?

Keep the little ones laughing with silly jokes like this one.

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A wise quacker.

3 Witty What Do You Call Jokes

Have you ever been forced to socialize with folks you're not really interested in? Well, these witty what do you call jokes could be your saving grace. If you're looking for a way out of the doldrums, don't worry because we have a solution.

And no, it doesn't involve you climbing out the bathroom window to escape. Though, that could work, and we'll call it, Plan B. But Plan A is to whip up the energy with some witty jokes that everyone will enjoy.

Not only will you not have to risk getting stuck in the bathroom window like Winnie the Poo, but you might actually make some new friends.

7. What do you call a beautiful pumpkin?

Who said the produce department has to be boring?

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GOURDgeous.

8. What do you call a cow with no legs?

A funny food joke AND an animal joke wrapped into one? Perfect.

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Ground beef.

9. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves?

Okay, this one's just plain funny.

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Russel

3 Funniest What Do You Call Jokes Ever

We saved these funniest what do you call jokes ever for you, so you can dig them out the next time you're chilling with friends. Not to be wasted on an unappreciative crowd, the downright funniest jokes ever are best shared over snacks and beer.

10. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?

Use this one at every party for the rest of your life. It'll never get old.

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Nacho cheese!

11. What do you call a dog who goes to the beach in the summer?

A classic hot dog joke fit for every summer BBQ.

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A hot dog.

12. What do you call a dinosaur that can't see?

A what do you call joke that's so silly it's guaranteed to get a chuckle.

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A do-you-think-he-saw-us.

3 Cheesy What Do You Call Jokes

Cheesy jokes are notoriously rib-tickling funny. They're a whole genre of giggles that's guaranteed to bring smiles to faces and make your life feel complete.

We searched high and low for the cheesiest jokes we could find. And when we found them, we kept digging for even cheesier ones.

13. What do you call a cow with THREE legs?

Another funny one for the dinner table.

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Tri tip.

14. What do you call a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench?

A fantastic one for the next time you're watching the game with the guys.

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The NBA.

15. What do you call a fly in your butter?

This what do you call joke it so obvious that everyone will laugh.

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A butterfly!

3 Stupid What Do You Call Jokes

Here's a news flash. Stupid jokes are really, really funny. It's like they fell right off the end of the dumb, dumb spectrum into a bucket of hilarity.

Not convinced? See for yourself

16. What do you call a dog with no legs?

If you have the right audience, this joke will get folks crying with laughter.

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Call him whatever you want, he's not coming.

17. What do you call the heavy breathing someone makes while trying to hold a yoga pose?

The only thing funnier than a fart in a yoga class is a good yoga joke.

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Yoga pants.

18. What do you call a dead fly?

The perfect joke to end a dramatic battle with a fly swatter.

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A flew.

3 What Do You Call Dog Jokes

So you have canine's on your mind, and you like to live with a healthy daily dose of humor. These dog jokes are exactly what you need to cheerfully pass the time at the dog park or the vet's office.

19. What do you call an old dog?

An easy one that all dog lovers will enjoy.

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Grandpaw!

20. What do you call a black Eskimo dog?

A dog joke with a rhyming punch line? Yes, please.

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A dusky husky!

21. What do you call a dog that licks an electrical socket?

Shock your friends with this smart dog joke.

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Sparky.

3 Political What Do You Call Jokes

Politics can be confusing, but one things for sure. They make darn good fodder for the comedy scene; always have and always will. And that's why our what do you call jokes article wouldn't be complete without some knee slapping political jokes.

22. What do you call a Russian procrastinator?

Because poking fun at Russian may never get old.

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Putinoff.

23. What do you call a pro gamer that tests politics simulator games?

Gamers will love this what do you call joke.

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Pro-tester.

24. What do you call a basement full of Conservatives?

The perfect one-liner for the more progressive crowd.

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A whine cellar.

3 What Do You Call Science Jokes

Science can be too serious with climate change and dissecting frogs and such. That's why it's crucial to have a few good science jokes up your sleeve. It's the perfect fix for when folks start taking life too seriously.

25. What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silly con and a clown in jail? This one's just too good to waste.

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A silicon.

26. What do you call a swim team made up of girls named Jennifer?

A clever quip that all the science geeks will enjoy.

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Hydrogens!

27. What do you call Iron blowing in the wind?

Because Fe is the symbol for iron. Don't worry, your science friends will get it.

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Febreeze.

3 Christmas What Do You Call Jokes

What better time to keep the mood light and full of laughs than the holidays? Keep your family chuckling all Christmas long with these hilarious Christmas jokes.

28. What do you call a snowman with a six pack?

A killer snowman joke to entertain with some eggnog by the fire.

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An abdominal snowman.

29. What do you call an obnoxious reindeer?

Keep the holiday cheer going with this silly reindeer joke.

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RUDEolph.

30. What do you call a kid who doesn’t believe in Santa?

A good one for those grinchy non-believers.

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A rebel without a Claus.

3 What Do You Call Math Jokes

Guess what? Math geeks love to laugh, too. And with these whimsical numbers (that was a pun), the math jokes never stop coming.

31. What do you call dudes who love math?

If your audience enjoys algebra, they'll love this math crack.

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Algebros.

32. What do you call a man who spent all summer at the beach?

A geometry joke for the analytical folk.

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A tangent.

33. What do you call people who like tractors?

Math teacher? Or better yet, substitute math teacher? You need this one.

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Protractors

3 What Do You Call Computer Jokes

Ever have a computer that just doesn't want to work for you? Maybe it curses you with the black screen of death, or maybe it likes to freeze mid typing. Well, don't cry about it. Instead, laugh about it with these sure-to-make-you-chuckle computer jokes.

34. What do you call a computer program that writes a blues song about climate change?

Here's an ingenious knee-slapper that somehow combines computers, music, and Al Gore.

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An Al-Gore-rhythm!

35. What do you call a computer floating in the ocean?

The Dell and Adele computer jokes are just too good to pass up.

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A Dell rolling in the deep.

36. What do you call a country with slow internet speeds?

This one might date you a bit, but it's sure to land on the right age group.

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America Online.

3 What Do You Call Military Jokes

If you are or ever were in the military, you fully understand how important it is to have a great sense of humor. Or maybe you're a civilian with some jarhead buddies that you could use a hand fitting in with a little easier.

Try out these ear-wide grinning military jokes that every military branch from the Navy to the Marines will appreciate.

37. What Do You Call a Marine with an Open Head Wound?

Veterans and enlisted folks alike can't get enough of these military jokes.

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Ajar head.

38. What Do You Call a Marine with an IQ of 160?

A low IQ joke probably best left for the actual marines to joke about.

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A platoon!

39. What do you call autistic soldiers?

Another zinger sure to get a decent late-night chuckle in the barracks.

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Special forces

3 What Do You Call Coffee Jokes

Overly caffeinated coffee people are an innately quirky bunch. Maybe they're brains are wired a little differently, or maybe they're just plain wired from all the espresso. Who knows? But with these yuck-yuckety-yuck-worthy coffee jokes, they'll never have to stop buzzing.

40. What do you call sad coffee?

For that overworked barista that's been up since 4am making frothy lattes.

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Depresso.

41. What do you call it when cafe customers joke about their coffee?

Keep sippin' and keep giggling with this brew-tastic punch line.

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A brewhaha.

42. What do you call a happy coffee?

Cause sometimes the line at the coffee shop could use a little pick me up.

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A happiccino.

3 What Do You Call Lawyer Jokes

Lawyers are just too easy to poke fun at. They certainly have a bad rap. And while we're not here to argue whether or not they deserve all the shaming, we're definitely here to make as much fun of them as possible with these stinging lawyer jokes.

43. What do you call a lawyer that becomes a priest?

What kind of joke ties together lawyers and priesthood? This one does.

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A father in law.

44. What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?

A little tongue-in-cheek with a big laugh out loud if you will?

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Your Honor.

45. What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?

Try this fun and silly setup with an aggressive punch line at your next hearing.

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Skeet.

4 What Do You Call Pirate Jokes

What's funnier than a group of dirty, thieving, sea-faring, salty, rum-slugging gangsters who live on a boat together and say funny things that nobody else understands? Nothing's more funny than pirates, especially the pirate jokes they sling around the deck while they're swashbuckling.

46. What do you call a pirate with two eyes, two hands and two legs?

Why are jokes about people missing body parts so entertaining? Maybe some questions are best left unanswered.

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A beginner.

47. What do you call it when a pirate has chronic sleeping problems?

Don't keep yourself up at night trying to make this one any funnier. It's already perfect.

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Restless Peg Syndrome

48. What do you call a pirate without an eyepatch?

A classic pirate joke fit to cure the worst case of scurvy.

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Eye Eye Captain

49. What do you call a pirate that skips class?

Save this one for your next boat fishing excursion with the guys.

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Captain Hooky!

3 Bad What Do You Call Jokes

Looking for some truly bad what do you call jokes to liven up your next road trip? You need these extremely bad jokes because they're so bad they're absurdly entertaining.

50. What do you call a ghostly reindeer?

Work this one into a game of peek-a-boo, and you're a sure hit.

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Cari-boo!

51. What do you call a ruler, protractor and a compass all hanging out together?

Another great zinger for the teachers to break the ice or just reset the mood.

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Weapons of math instruction.

52. What do you call a Frenchman in sandals?

Have fun with this beach-worthy rib-tickler.

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Philippe Philoppe.

How To Pick The Best "What Do You Call" Joke

Not all kinds of jokes are going to work all the time for all different people. And with so many different categories of what do you call jokes to choose from, where's a clever jokester to start?

Follow these how-to steps to make sure you're on the funny track to hilarity and not off the rails heading towards social disaster.

1. Make Sure to Have Fun

The best zingers and one-liners generate most of their impact from the way they're delivered.

And the best way to make a good joke land is to truly enjoy telling it. If you're having fun, your audience is much more likely to get on board and have fun with you.

Make sure to pick a category of jokes that works for you, and the rest will come naturally.

2. Know Your Audience

A room full of devout nuns probably isn't the best opportunity to whip out some killer church jokes.

But a quiet intermission at a baby's christening surrounded by family and weekend warrior worshipers might be the perfect audience for some mildly fun, tongue-in-cheek blasphemy.

3. Drop the Mic

Last but not least, one of the most important rules in landing jokes is to never wait around for approval. Your audience is either going to get it or they're not. They're either going to have a sense of humor, or they won't. Haters are gonna hate, so don't give them any more attention than they deserve.

If you pay attention to the first two steps and do your due diligence, the rest is on the crowd.

Downloadable and Printable List of What Do You Call Jokes

Here is a downloadable and printable list of What Do You Call Jokes (right click the image and select Save Image As...):

More Great Jokes

Ready for even more great jokes to keep the energy up no matter what the occasion?

Check out some more great jokes that will never leave you bored.

  1. We overheard these delicious nerd jokes during an astronomy club potluck, and they're hilarious.
  2. Never let the fun die on turkey day with these clever thanksgiving jokes.
  3. Since we're terrified of sharks, we found these rib-tickling shark jokes to make them seem less scary.
  4. Ready to be the coolest guy in the office with these fantastic office jokes?
  5. The next time you're at church, you won't have to pass the time pretending to read the Bible with these borderline blasphemous church jokes.

In Conclusion

A life without humor is just too darn sad to imagine, and that' why we absolutely need an exhaustive library of silly what do you call jokes.Use these jokes whenever life's traffic jams or waiting rooms dare to drag down your fantastic mood, and never let grumpy stick-in-the-mud people ruin your day.

The next time you feel the fun times waning or you sense a buzzkill in your midst, break out a few classic what do you call jokes to lift life back to the fun zone.