Tis the season for laughing it up with your family and friends over these thanksgiving jokes! If you're looking for the best holiday jokes around, you've come to the right place.
It's no secret that thanksgiving get-togethers can end up being stressful. With so many family members that only see each other a few times in a year, there's bound to be tension -- and what's the best way to dispel those awkward moments? With humor, of course!
So dive right into this big list of thanksgiving jokes, and you'll have a whole set of icebreakers ready for whatever comes your way this holiday season. Grab your notepad to write down your favorites, and read on!
Contents
7 Best Thanksgiving Jokes To Share To Your Family
Let's start with the cream of the crop: The best thanksgiving jokes around, guaranteed to get a chuckle out of even the most serious of uncles. These should be your go-to jokes for parents and kids alike.
1. Why was the Thanksgiving soup so expensive?
This joke works because it's a not-so-subtle play on words that equates carrots with solid gold.
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It had 24 carrots.
2. What smells the best at a Thanksgiving dinner?
Perfect for kids, this joke is a hit when you combine it with stealing their nose.
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Your nose.
3. Which cat discovered America?
Add a longer lead-up to this joke, and you might get people to believe that a cat actually discovered the New World.
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Christofurry Columbus
4. Which holiday is Dracula's favorite?
This one does double duty -- you can save it for Halloween, as well!
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Fangs-giving
5. When do you serve tofu turkey?
Also known as "Tofurkey", this meat substitute has been the butt of many jokes in popular sitcoms.
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Pranksgiving
6. Why did the turkey cross the road twice?
Because "why did the chicken cross the road" jokes only have him cross once! This one's nudging into "dad joke" territory for sure.
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To prove he wasn't chicken
7. What is the best song to sing when preparing your turkey?
Meghan Trainor achieved worldwide celebrity with the original, All About That Bass. You can listen to the song here.
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All About that Baste.
5 Best Dad Jokes About Thanksgiving You Can't Miss Out
For the most groan-inducing jokes possible, you'll have to channel your inner dad. Each of these thanksgiving humor from dads is guaranteed to make eyes roll and kids ashamed of you.
8. Why was the cook late to Thanksgiving dinner?
The thyme/time switch-up is a classic dad joke move, substituting homophones for each other to great comedic effect.
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He lost track of thyme.
9. What role do green beans play in Thanksgiving dinner?
Green bean casserole is a love it or hates it sort of dish, with some people falling in love with the cream of mushroom soup while others can't stand the texture.
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The casse-role.
10. Who is not hungry at Thanksgiving?
Also because he's been cooked, but that's not quite as great for a joke.
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The turkey, because he's already stuffed!
11. What is a turkey's favorite dessert?
Wordplay like this is a classic element of the best dad jokes that never fails to produce exasperated sighs.
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Peach gobbler!
12. My family told me to stop telling Thanksgiving jokes...
This is a great one-liner to throw in whenever there's a break in conversation at the dinner table.
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but I told them I couldn't quit "cold turkey."
5 Best Thanksgiving Day Jokes To Use On Your Kids
Almost all of these thanksgiving jokes can be great jokes for kids, but the ones on the following list are especially good for younger kids.
13. What’s the ratio of a pumpkin’s circumference to its diameter?
A math joke and a thanksgiving joke rolled into one -- what's this world coming to?
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Pumpkin pi.
14. What’s inside a genie’s turkey?
Kids love fighting over the wishbone after thanksgiving dinner, and that's a great time to tell this joke.
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Wishbones
15. Where do turkey’s go to dance?
Yep, that's the name of the most famous brand of turkey breast that's cooked on thanksgiving in America.
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The Butterball.
16. What kind of key can't open doors?
Anything turkey-related is a sure bet for kids' thanksgiving jokes.
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A tur-key.
17. Why did the turkey play the drums in his band?
You can illustrate this one for kids by mocking playing the drums with your turkey parts!
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Because he already had drum sticks!
5 Best Jokes To Tell During Thanksgiving Celebration
Somewhere between dad jokes and jokes for kids, corny jokes for thanksgiving are a great way to break out your most ridiculous humor.
18. What sound does a turkey's phone make?
Any joke with a turkey part in it is comedy gold around thanksgiving time.
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Wing, wing, wing!
19. Why did the sweet potatoes get so embarrassed?
Oh my! Ridiculous, corny, and scandalous all at the same time.
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They saw the turkey dressing!
20. What side dish tells the worst jokes?
A corny joke with a corn(y) joke in it? It's corny joke inception at its finest.
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Corn(y) bread!
21. Why did the turkey eat his meal so quickly?
Turkeys are sometimes referred to as "gobblers" because of the silly sound they make.
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Because he was a gobbler.
22. Why are Pilgrims’ pants always falling down?
It's almost too easy, but we bet no one will guess the answer to this unless they've heard the joke before.
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Their belt buckles are on their hats and shoes instead.
7 Best Thanksgiving Jokes That Are So Bad It Will Make You Laugh
There are silly jokes and corny jokes, and then there are just downright bad jokes. So pull out all the stops, and put your shame to one side -- these bad thanksgiving jokes truly are some of the worst you're going to hear this holiday season.
23. What Thanksgiving side dish could be given out at Halloween?
Could they really? Of course not. That's why this is an awful joke.
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Candied yams!
24. The boy wasn't happy about skinning potatoes on Thanksgiving Day,
Peel grim and pilgrim, get it? Get it? Yep, that's one heck of a bad joke.
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so I guess you could say he would Peel grim.
25. How did Albert Einstein celebrate Thanksgiving?
There's no way that anyone will guess the answer to this truly terrible joke.
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He was very thinkful.
26. How many chefs does it take to stuff a Thanksgiving turkey?
That would have to be a pretty small chef, or a pretty huge turkey!
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Only one and even then it’s a pretty tight squeeze
27. What did the baby corn say to the mama corn?
Kids will love and hate this joke at the same time; it's perfect for telling over a movie after dinner.
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Where’s pop corn?
28. What always comes at the end of Thanksgiving?
Be sure and let everyone guess what they think comes last before spilling the beans on this bad joke!
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The G
29. What kind of music did the Pilgrims like?
You can still visit the actual Plymouth Rock in Massachusetts!
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Plymouth Rock.
6 Best Knock Knock Jokes Based On The Ceremony of Giving Thanks
Knock Knock. Who's there? Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving who? These thanksgiving knock knock jokes for you!
Knock-knock jokes are a children's classic, and will usually start a contest to see who has the best knock knock jokes of all.
30. Knock knock…
Who’s there?
Phillip.
Phillip who?
You can definitely use this joke when you're handing out plates to kids at dinner time!
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Phillip a big plate of turkey and start eating!
31. Knock knock…
Who’s there?
Dewey.
Dewey who?
Tell this one to any kids nearby, and then have them go repeat it to whoever is in the kitchen cooking.
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Dewey have to wait much longer for the turkey?
32. Knock knock…
Who’s there?
Esther.
Esther who?
This one's a bit of a stretch, but it still makes a great joke to tell right after dessert.
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Esther any more sweet potato pie?
33. Knock knock…
Who’s there?
Wanda.
Wanda who?
Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade is an excellent tradition, even if you're just watching it on television.
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Wanda go watch the Thanksgiving Day Parade?
34. Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Arthur.
Arthur who?
Are there any leftovers? Of course, it's Thanksgiving! This one's extra corny, and pretty excellent.
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Arthur any leftovers?
35. Knock, Knock.
Who's there?
Norma Lee.
Norma Lee who?
This one is especially good, since Norma Lee is such an antiquated and uncommon name.
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Norma Lee I don't eat this much!
Downloadable And Printable List of Thanksgiving Jokes
Here is a downloadable and printable list of thanksgiving jokes (right-click the image and select save Image As...):
How To Pick The Best Thanksgiving Joke
Trying to decide on which thanksgiving jokes are best, but having a hard time figuring it out? Easy. Just follow these three simple steps to pick the best thanksgiving jokes for you and your family.
1. Think of Your Audience
First and foremost, you'll need to think about who you're telling these thanksgiving jokes to. If you're looking for a way to keep kids entertained, keep the jokes short and simple; if your audience is a tougher crowd, you'll need more original jokes. Or, go the opposite way and choose the corniest jokes available no matter what!
2. Have Jokes For All Ages
Even if you think you'll be telling jokes just to a few people, it's good to have a few extras up your sleeve. You never know when you might get a reputation as "The Funny Guy" and be put on the spot to keep telling jokes!
3. Don't Take Yourself Too Seriously
Lastly, remember that all of these jokes are meant to be in the spirit of shared fun. Even the silliest jokes can get a laugh if you deliver them with the right tone, or at the right time -- so don't be afraid to practice telling jokes that you think might not work!
More Hilarious Jokes to Share or Start a conversation With
If you loved those jokes, then you'll definitely appreciate these other topics as well! Try out some of these other hilarious joke categories today:
- Get the best techie-friendly humor with this list of computer jokes.
- Do you know someone who can't get enough of the jitter juice? These coffee jokes will be perfect for perking them up.
- Amorous intentions don't have to be serious -- lighten the mood with any of the jokes on this big list of love jokes.
In Conclusion
That's it for this big list of the best thanksgiving jokes around. Hopefully, you've found plenty of great one-liners and longer jokes to keep yourself and everyone else entertained this holiday season. Good luck, and happy thanksgiving!